Journey Blog with John
We have been talking about Fear of Failure which are my two least favorite F words. In this post, I will share how I use awareness of fear as an opportunity to grow and move towards freedom.
Here are the four steps of my framework:
With my Declaration powerfully made, I am ready for Discovery.
The question I ask myself now, the thing I’m trying to Discover is, “What am I really afraid of?” and the keyword is really which will require some digging. This is the step to get to the heart to the matter. I want to discover why fear has this power in my life. The initial feeling of hesitation is usually a smoke screen that keeps me from looking deeper, so to clear it away and move closer to what’s really going on, I ask myself “Why?” three times. This helps uncover what is at the bottom of this fear. It may not take three tries, but it’s almost always more than one.
Example, recently it was time for me to work on a new marketing idea. After talking about it with a friend, he pointed out that I had talked about this before...in fact I brought it up months ago, and I still had not done anything about it. Then he asked me a piercing question, “So why are you procrastinating?” Uh oh, busted!
Later as I reflected on this, I realized he was right. I had been hesitating to move forward with this idea, so I began the Discovery Step and asked myself “Why am I hesitating?” My first answer was “I just don’t have time.” That’s my go-to smoke screen excuse because I almost always have time for what is most important to me. So I asked myself again, “why am I really hesitating?” The second answer came to me as “I don’t know what to do.” In reality though, that was just another excuse. I actually had a framework for what I wanted to do laid out already. I asked the final, “Why?” which led to the breakthrough. “Because everyone will see….” Marketing is very public, and I had been worried (afraid) that my plans wouldn’t work, making this a public fail. The real reason I have been hesitating is because of Fear of Failure.
No wonder I had procrastinated for so long. This wasn’t really about knowledge, or time, or priorities, it was about success. Or failure.
Simple, right? Not really, but worth the effort because now I can do something about it.
Discovering what is behind my fear was the beginning of the process of becoming who I really wanted to be. The next steps dig further into why and how to step into freedom, so if you are also on this journey too, be encouraged; you are closer than you think.
If you are willing to share, I would love to hear from you. What do you find when you dig to the bottom of your fear? (ask “Why?” three times)
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